I wasn't going to test

I convinced myself, in order to not let trying to conceive consume me this time, that I wasn't going to test so early... and wait until I miss my period to do so. But then after going to the stupid fertility doctor, he made me all worried about my progesterone levels saying how he didn't like my chart because my temperatures were really up and down. So I flipped my rationale and told myself that I needed to test asap so I can have my regular OB give me a blood test and progesterone test. That way they can give me progesterone supplements, not that it's known to do very much. In the medical world, progesterone is controversial because most believe that low progesterone is an indication that you have a nonviable pregnancy - and not a cause of a miscarraige, so you can't reverse it.



Anyways, I dipped a test in my urine this morning. I needed to! For medical purposes! I'm still extremely early, only 9 days post ovulation - the earliest HCG will show, I guess. For the first few minutes I stared at the stick, it was blank besides the control line. I thought, well that's weird, because we had sex five days straight before and during ovulation!! Also, I started having symptoms last two days, especially yesterday (8DPO)... my boobs were SO swollen and were tender throughout the first half of the day (the second half, they deflated (weird)). Also, I had incredible gas. These two have always been my first indications of pregnancy.



So a total of probably 3-4 mins past, the slightest line began to appear next to the control line. Click to view larger.

So now I know I wasn't insane to feel like I was pregnant for the past two days. I am. This is usually the easiest part. The next 2, 3 weeks will be the hardest. On Tuesday, I'll have to request OB to order me a HCG/progesterone test. Get the results, then the week after that I'll have to get another HCG to see if it's rising. Then schedule an ultrasound at around 7-8 weeks (if we get that far) and hope for a heartbeat. I hate being negative, but I also don't want my heart shattered into a jillion pieces once more. If I stay pessimistic, maybe it'll just shatter into 2 million pieces instead.