Is it unreasonable for me to still feel extremely nervous about losing this baby even after 3 beautiful ultrasounds with heartbeats and jumping jacks? I woke up in the middle of the night to pee today, I did, but it felt more like routine - like a mentally induced habit now - instead of a real physical need. So does that mean anything? Then I felt my boobs in the morning like I always do if it's not obviously in pain... and they feel a bit smaller.
:( why can't second trimester come sooner.
And I need to stop reading other people's miscarriage stories on forums.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Doppler: to rent or not...
So at the last doctor's appointment... I asked her opinion on renting dopplers. She said they're fine, except you may not hear anything until 15 weeks and up?
I'm thinking of getting one because from the time your morning sickness begin to disappear (approx. 12 weeks) until you can actually feel you baby move inside of you (20 weeks and up), you have no clue if everything is ok or not... Unless you get a super high power fetal heartbeat doppler!!
Digital ones that tell you the heartrate costs about $40-50 a month. I would probably use it for only 2 months until I begin to feel movement. So... $100? Worth it? And what if it's just one of those days that the baby is hiding from your doppler and you can't find the heartbeat? I would FUREAK. Got to think thoroughly if it's worth it or not, money wise, and mental health wise.
I'm thinking of getting one because from the time your morning sickness begin to disappear (approx. 12 weeks) until you can actually feel you baby move inside of you (20 weeks and up), you have no clue if everything is ok or not... Unless you get a super high power fetal heartbeat doppler!!
Digital ones that tell you the heartrate costs about $40-50 a month. I would probably use it for only 2 months until I begin to feel movement. So... $100? Worth it? And what if it's just one of those days that the baby is hiding from your doppler and you can't find the heartbeat? I would FUREAK. Got to think thoroughly if it's worth it or not, money wise, and mental health wise.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Belly shots
Well - the first pregnancy, I took shots of my belly every week... until I found out it wasn't going to work. Second pregnancy, I didn't even get a chance to - it ended so quickly. This time, I didn't allow myself to take any in fear of the first time repeating itself. So, I've only taken one picture so far... at 10 weeks, even though my massive bloating was at around 8 to 9 weeks.
It's all just bloating still, because if I haven't eaten in a looong time (on weekends I sleep in), I wake up with a flat belly. But during the day, I have to rubber band my pant buttons together and the tabs are about 3 inches away from each other still. No one noticed my bloat belly because I wear mostly tunics and flowy tops (thank goodness for current fashion), but at times, I can definitely look 5 months pregnant. Whew.
10 weeks (air balloon)
I have no idea why this picture is inverted, I didn't do it.
Pre-pregnancy (bye bye thin curves)
It's all just bloating still, because if I haven't eaten in a looong time (on weekends I sleep in), I wake up with a flat belly. But during the day, I have to rubber band my pant buttons together and the tabs are about 3 inches away from each other still. No one noticed my bloat belly because I wear mostly tunics and flowy tops (thank goodness for current fashion), but at times, I can definitely look 5 months pregnant. Whew.
10 weeks (air balloon)
I have no idea why this picture is inverted, I didn't do it.
Pre-pregnancy (bye bye thin curves)
It's moving!!!!!!!! 10w3d scan
My bean has become a baby!! With arms and legs, and a very visible skull structure! Most exciting part was we saw it dance and hop and doing the body wave! It was SO amazing! This is the first time I’ve seen fetal movement and it was just so incredible to see a living moving being inside of me. Seeing it move definitely substantiated its existence and hopefully continued existence. I’m pregnant! We’ve created a life!
It was measuring 41 mms and at 10weeks 6 days although doctor said give or take about a week due to equipment inaccuracies, so we didn’t change my dates. Heart was beating at doctor’s guess, 150-160 bpm.
Well we're super duper excited, but probably won’t stop worrying until it’s full term and out of me. The next thing to worry about is the first trimester screening in 2 weeks for chromosomal abnormalities. Based on our family history, we shouldn’t have much to worry about, but you just never know.
We got the most amazing scans! They're beautiful and I even have a clear one of it's skull!!! So cool! Hubby said it looks like the Punisher lol. Doc tried to get a profile shot but the babe kept swimming around turning its back towards us. It was soooo cute!
It was measuring 41 mms and at 10weeks 6 days although doctor said give or take about a week due to equipment inaccuracies, so we didn’t change my dates. Heart was beating at doctor’s guess, 150-160 bpm.
Well we're super duper excited, but probably won’t stop worrying until it’s full term and out of me. The next thing to worry about is the first trimester screening in 2 weeks for chromosomal abnormalities. Based on our family history, we shouldn’t have much to worry about, but you just never know.
We got the most amazing scans! They're beautiful and I even have a clear one of it's skull!!! So cool! Hubby said it looks like the Punisher lol. Doc tried to get a profile shot but the babe kept swimming around turning its back towards us. It was soooo cute!
The Punisher?
Baby's frontal head view:
Monday, March 9, 2009
Next scan tomorrow: 10 weeks 3 days
Just a tad bit nervous about the scan tomorrow because - you just never know and I absolutely hate surprises. I still feel "off" like not quite sick, but uncomfortable in my belly, and there's definitely some loss of appetite. And my boobs are really sore today... not sure if it's because I was in a push-up bra all day. I'm about ready to call it a day though, it's 9:43pm. Not sure if it's because I'm used to it by now, or perhaps my bloating has begun to subside? I don't constantly feel like an air balloon anymore.
Hoping for good news.
Hoping for good news.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
More reflections 10 weeks
I had a relatively normal day yesterday, which is surprising since I've never felt worst the night before that. I was a bit exhausted around 4-5pm so laid around watching TV feeling a little moody. But there was no sickness. I can see now that from past patterns that my "morning" sickness is worst in the evening... probably because I'm tired and need a nap, but not only do I not get one, but this is the time when I return home from work and typically need to use energy to find food for humans and feed/play/take care of the dog and 1 new puppy. I would try to take naps, but I always fall into deep sleep instead and ruin the rest of my night cuz I get so groggy. At least now I have a pattern. Will need to find out how to make it better.
Friday, March 6, 2009
9 weeks 6 days
Morning sickness symptoms:
Beginning on 9 weeks 1 days, I had this nagging but minor nausea all day, coupled with constant hunger. I'll eat, it'll go away for a little while, then come back. It lasted 3 days. Then yesterday... it went away in the morning, then came back times 3 in the evening. I was supposed to meet my hubby and 2 friends at a restaurant at 7:00pm. At 6, I started losing my appetite. 6:30, nausea kicked in, this time, it was bad enough that I put my head over the sink, thinking maybe something might come out. None. So I canceled the dinner and went to bed at 7:00pm. 7:30pm my stomach was brewing up a storm... like literally. Wind kept passing out of me, it was like an upset stomach again.
Next scans:
On Tuesday (10 weeks 3 days), I'm having my next regular OB scan that I insisted on scheduling because I'm a worried wart. In a way I'm a bit reassured because of all my symptoms so far this week, and my boobs are still growing, but I need to see that heartbeat. Especially since the first miscarriage was at 10 weeks. Although I had zero morning sickness last time.
Two weeks after that at 12 weeks 4 days, I have a first trimester screening where they will check for signs of chromosomal abnormalities. If all goes well, I think this is the point where we tell family. Praying all goes well!!
Beginning on 9 weeks 1 days, I had this nagging but minor nausea all day, coupled with constant hunger. I'll eat, it'll go away for a little while, then come back. It lasted 3 days. Then yesterday... it went away in the morning, then came back times 3 in the evening. I was supposed to meet my hubby and 2 friends at a restaurant at 7:00pm. At 6, I started losing my appetite. 6:30, nausea kicked in, this time, it was bad enough that I put my head over the sink, thinking maybe something might come out. None. So I canceled the dinner and went to bed at 7:00pm. 7:30pm my stomach was brewing up a storm... like literally. Wind kept passing out of me, it was like an upset stomach again.
Next scans:
On Tuesday (10 weeks 3 days), I'm having my next regular OB scan that I insisted on scheduling because I'm a worried wart. In a way I'm a bit reassured because of all my symptoms so far this week, and my boobs are still growing, but I need to see that heartbeat. Especially since the first miscarriage was at 10 weeks. Although I had zero morning sickness last time.
Two weeks after that at 12 weeks 4 days, I have a first trimester screening where they will check for signs of chromosomal abnormalities. If all goes well, I think this is the point where we tell family. Praying all goes well!!
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