3 days old

Nolan has made great progress. Day 1 he was on oxygen, under a heat lamp, and placed on IV.  he had one episode of sleep apnea, where he did not wake up from falling asleep and his heart stopped.  this is common for that gestational age, the nurses had to wake him up.

then he slowly got taken off the oxygen, it was able to switch from the heat lamp to a regular crib, and started to breastfeed on day 2. He did great with latching on and swallowing.  So they started bottle feeding him when I did not breastfeed.

He is now up to 25 ml of formula per 3 hour feeding.  He drinks most of it.

pumping for nicu baby

The first day I pumped and got absolutely nothing.. had to just stimulate with pump for 20 mins then after a few sessions, I was getting a drop of colostrum.  I used a syringe to get those invaluable drops of liquid gold... had to hand express them out and only was able to get 0.1 - 0.2mls per session.  the nicu staff took whatever in gave them and mixed it in with formula.

The next day, I was able to hand express a bit more colodtrum, about 0.4 total per session, then all of a sudden, it seemed it dry out.  I couldn't get any more.  But the next few sessions reaped a few milliliters of colostrom-y milk.  I just continued to faithfully pump every 2-3 hours, and actually visited my babe in the nicu during every feeding to offer him the breast to stimulate production.  A pump could never create the same stimulation to your body the way a baby's suck could.

So by the 3rd day, my milk finally came in.  I was getting more and more... almost at 5-10mls now each session and almost catching up to baby's prescribed feedings, so that he didn't need to have formula as a supplement.  I was so proud.

Now, 9 days after birth, im getting way too much milk from pumping. exclusively is a new experience for me.  I get to see how much milk I'm producing...how much baby is eating... and it keeps my supply steady.  But also it has.turned me into a milk.cow... becuz I am producing so much milk that I get auto let downs after two hours of pumping... and full on soaking the breast pads during night time sleep of more than 4 hours.

I would like to switch to full time breast feeding... then I can slow down the production.  The pump is way too strong for my preemie appetite right now.  I don't need that much milk.  Yikes.

birth at 33 weeks and 6 days

Apparently there was a bit of meconium in the water that leaked and both my husband and the OB recommended that I take him out by c section... so I got cut up for the second time at 7am on 7/5/2013.

Nolan was born 5 lbs 2 oz. 18 inches long.  He is a pretty good size at 33 weeks and 6 days old.  He had the cutest squeakiest cry I've ever heard, which made me bawl like heck.  Even though he had a great apgar test of 7/9, he was rushed into the nicu to get help with oxygen.

Meanwhile, I was trying to recover from my surgery and had to wait 12 hours.before i could see my baby.  It was horrible... I forgot how terrible having been cut up was.

fuck my luck...my water broke

No later did i make that positive post about being 34 weeks... that I fucking break my god damn water.

Maybe I had walked around a little too much today getting lunch and water by myself... or maybe it was due to sitting up too much at dinner and again for fireworks out in the yard... but at 11:50pm I got up to pee and ended up feeling water flowing out of my other area.

Saw a streak of something black when I wiped and ignored it cuz the fluid was clear and odor less.  i thought meconium was much more obvious than a little streak.  Well.. came into labor and delivery and nurse confirmed it was poop.

Now I'm strapped to the monitors to make sure he is OK..but have to wait a long while for any word on the plan of action because every damn doctor and nurse is busy.

34 weeks yay!

Well it looks like belly is growing fine.  Baby is very regularly active too.

Usually starting his day at 8/9am...then sleep and awake from 11-6pm on and off.  Beginning 9pm is his most active time.. nonstop rolling, punching, foot jabbing my right side and ribs, etc.  He is done exercising around 1am and stays pretty much asleep with few rolls here and there if I get up to potty or turn sides.  And awake again around 8am.

Compared to my daughter, he is much more active.

33 weeks and second opinions

I'm reaching 33 weeks tomorrow and have been on bed rest for a little under 3 weeks now.  contractions are sparse.. only when i lay on my back or some times random tightenings will occur as I'm on my side.  But no bleeding anymore.  I'm feeling more confident yet at the same time...confused.

Had my 32 week check up with my regular OB on Tuesday, he claims that he does not believe it is a placenta issue as I have no previa.  The only other known reason for the bleed would be cervical inflammations or polyps or other issues, which he checked with an internal exam and ruled it out.  He unfortunately did not have the ER report so had to go by what I told him, but he is of the opinion that I am not in any life or death situation and other than resting frequently and no shopping trips, I should be able to walk around the house, make quick meals, and showed daily.

The only problem is that when he measured my belly at 31 weeks.  During the ER ultrasound at 30 weeks, baby was already measuring at 31 weeks.  So I'm a bit paranoid that the baby hasn't grown at all.since my bleed, which could signify placenta problems.  Or I am just being paranoid because belly measurements could be off due to many variables like the position of the baby, or how much food I've had during that visit.

The other thing is, my belly looks like.it hasn't grown from my last picture.  My next OB appointment is at 35 weeks, in 14 days.  I can wait it out until.then to get measured again and see if belly has grown. And in the mean while, just maintain a kick chart to make sure baby is moving well. Or I can make an appt a week before my schedule appt and risk annoying my OB again.  Sigh.

guess who else is on bedrest

Pathetic lol

doing fine

Feeling better as I get up more to pee and venture out a bit farther than the bathroom.  But I still get braxron hicks tightenings randomly.. at least once every hour or two.  They don't hurt or vet more intense so I can live with them.

But my hair!! i want to shave it all off!! Its so annoying and matted.

bed rest day 5 (31 weeks)

Lying around all day is actually really hard.  There are so many things physically you take for granted like.. sitting up straight and being able to breathe normally.

In a lying position, your chest is always compressed and so not only are you not really getting enough oxygen, but your chest muscles start to hurt and you get random heart murmurs.

Then when you do roll up to go potty, your body is not accustomed to normal gravity, and so every organ feels like its getting sucked down to the ground, including your uterus, which is very scary.  You catch your breath and take a few weak steps, and you realize how much leg muscles you've already lost.  In fact, I have already lost 4 lbs of muscle mass just laying around, even though I have normal meals and snacks.  My muscles have atrophied... so quickly.

I am trying to be faithful and stay on strict bed rest. But since I can't afford a nurse, I have to potty in the toilet... and try to bathe myself. I'm also supposed to drink lots and lots of water, which means more trips to the bathroom.  So today, I've probably gotten up every 3-4 hours and had a sit down shower for 5 mins tops (since I can't stand for more than a min without feeling like passing out).  I have noticed tightening almost every hour at different spots of my uterus... sort of like wherever the baby was pushing me at the moment it starts to contract is where I feel tightening most.  I'm wary of them, but not too alarmed, especially because I am not bleeding.  In fact, it has been clear all day.

Maybe I should try to get up less though.  But then again, when your bladder is full, you get more contractions.

every time i post about a new pregnancy

Something goes wrong.  after getting those braxton hicks and an achy crampy belly all night, I woke up the next day to have even more aches and pains in my uterus.  Thought maybe the baby was just kicking me too hard on the inside, so I ignored it and took my daughter to her swim lessons.  The entire time I was uncomfortable.  Went to JoAnn fabric store to return something and ended up bleeding all over the store.

Called 911 since blood was running down my legs and paramedics got there in 5 mins.  Was such a horrible panic since I had my daughter with me and I couldn't reach my husband on the phone.

Anyways got to the hospital and 3 hours later had ultrasound done to determine that there were no obvious threat.  My placenta was at the right spot and did not rupture.  Although there could be a tear somewhere.

I was observed at the hospital for 2 days to monitor the bleeding and contraction, which is now under control.  When I first bled at Joanns I was contracting every 3 minutes though they were not painful.  Doctor says it is caused by the irratation from the blood and he is not too concerned that they will put me in labor since he checked my pelvis and I was not dialated.

I am now at home on strict bed rest... laying down with zero activity.. only to go potty.  I don't know how to get to the shower as its on the second floor.

But good news is that I am 31 weeks today and the baby is about 3 to 3 1/2 lbs. We are taking it a day or week at a time.  Hoping to to reach at least 35/36 weeks, which seems so far away.

The baby is incredibly active, which is awesome.  And we are lucky to have a family member who is here to help with mommy duties which I can not tend to... biggest relieve ever.

30 weeks

Just had 4 braxton hicks in a row... is that common around this time of pregnancy?

pregnant for the fifth time...

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