Tonight marks 2 full months from the start of my bleeding in September that indicated the beginning of my miscarriage. The second miscarriage of the year.
Tonight, I am still bleeding. For 8 weeks, I have been bleeding. Not only do I have to endure the constant reminder that I am once again emptied out, robbed of a baby, but I am forced to be stagnant, in a torturous psyche limbo. By this time, we were supposed to be trying again to conceive for the third freaken time this year. It was something I looked forward to, the only thing that kept me optimistic, and from hiding in a dark corner to cry everynight. Instead, I see red. Red that is preventing me from charting my temp, from knowing when or if I ovulated, and worst of all, from being able to be intimate with my husband!
Here's a timeline for reference's sake:
August 27: big fat positive on the 1st day of my missed period.
Sept 12: ultrasound revealed gestational sac with no yolk sac or fetal pole. Was supposed to be 5weeks 5days, but sac measured 5 weeks only.
Sept 13: began spotting red.
Sept 23: began miscarriage.
Sept 29: most heavy bleeding stopped. Began endless nagging light bleeding/spotting.
Oct 24: began heavier light spotting. (period?)
Oct 31: Micracle! all bleeding gone!
Nov 5: Little red is back.
It does not look like little red is leaving soon. I guess I'll need some medical intervention.
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